3 self-loving reminders on bodyfeeding from a postpartum doula — kristen jeré
august is national breast feeding month while the 25-31 of august is recognized as Black breastfeeding week.
Black birthing folks in the u.s. have a complicated relationship to bodyfeeding* from lack of access to the time and nurturing that bodyfeeding requires (think slavery and how Black women often had to prioritize caring for the master’s babies and children over their own) to the stereotyping of Black women in the 90s as unfit mothers, and thus, unfit to breastfeed (if you want to read more about the policies and prejudice that made these ideas common, i recommend reading killing the black body)
here are a few reminders for the postpartum Black person who may be struggling with their relationship to bodyfeeding.
1. you get to decide if bodyfeeding is right for you
there are many reasons why you might choose not to bodyfeed. often birthing folks that have experienced different types of bodily trauma and dissociation from the body may not feel comfortable performing the intimacy that breastfeeding requires. as a doula, i’ve been taught to focus on what’s best for the birthing/postpartum person while other professionals in the field are focused on what’s best for the baby. it’s important to honor where you’re at with your body. pregnancy in itself along with postpartum represent a change to a new version of yourself. you may need time to adjust to these changes which can make things like bodyfeeding difficult. be gentle with yourself if this is your experience.
2. be curious of those who encourage you not to bodyfeed
just as much as you might feel that bodyfeeding isn’t for you, you may absolutely know that it is. that being said, Black birthing people have faced racism from hospitals and medical professionals over whether or not they should try breastfeeding. historically, there have been cases of Black women being encouraged not to breastfeed because of stereotypes of Black women as unfit mothers and more likely to be abusing drugs. in these cases, a lot of Black mothers have been dissuaded from bodyfeeding without any medical evidence that they individually are incapable or unfit to bodyfeed.
if you feel as though you’re being told by a medical professional or any bodyfeeding consultant that this route isn’t right for you, it’s well within your right to question if their analysis is accurate or not by internally asking yourself if their words feel racially motivated based on lack of evidence. check in with yourself and trust your gut.
if you find that this is the case, talk to your partner, a person in your postpartum care team, a trusted friend, etc. seek support in looking for a second opinion, preferably from a professional who shares part of your background and represents your values. seek recommendations for professionals in your area from postpartum support groups.
3. remember that it’s not all or nothing
whether you’re hesitant or excited about bodyfeeding, it’s not uncommon for postpartum folks to experience complications for a variety of reasons from the anatomical shape of the breast interfering with the baby’s latching, to a lack of nutrients in the postpartum person leading to a low milk flow (note: it’s so important to nurture your body with nutrient rich food during postpartum for this reason!).
if you find yourself having this completely normal experience, remember that you have options. if your milk flow is low, consider supplementing with formula. if the baby is having trouble latching, try bottle feeding for the time being and consider milk donation from another postpartum person if the nutrients found in breast milk are a priority (note: there has been plenty of research showing the benefits of breastfeeding; but this article is meant to affirm that bodyfeeding is a choice, so I won’t go into them in-depth here). if you’re wanting the bonding benefits that come with bodyfeeding but aren’t able to, consider techniques such as skin-to-skin, which can promote similar intimacy hormones to emerge in you and your baby.
when in doubt, know that your ability, whether it’s physical or mental, to bodyfeed does not make you more or less of a mother or parent. you are so worthy.
*bodyfeeding is a recent term meant to replace breastfeeding for it’s gender neutral language. unlike the term chestfeeding, which is also gender neutral, bodyfeeding serves as a reminder that breastfeeding is about more than just the chest and often encompasses every part of your body. the term is used interchangeably with breastfeeding in this article along with other gender neutral language.
kristen is a budding herbalist, doula, and a writer on identity, culture and Black womanhood. in her freetime, you can catch her watching something animated while reading one of the many books on her lists.
BY KRISTEN JERÉ
(she/her)
